A couple months before I joined up here, my cat Mikoto was diagnosed with Feline Immunodeficiency Virus. They said it was terminal and gave her a prognosis of three years, nothing left but palliative care. The last few months were particualrly difficult as she gradually lost weight.

Just after leaving for a business trip on the 17 (busy making preparations before then), I had her confined at an animal hospital. I was still two days away when she went. She was buried before I got home.

I've been very... what's the word... languid... apathetic... since then. I'm more of an animal person than a people person. Didn't bat an eye when my cousin died a couple years back. My cat, though? If I'd been around to see her dead, I probably would have gone nuts. Instead, I'm just... meh. Dream about her every other night, and every time, even in dreams, I realize it can't be her, because she's dead.

Thought maybe a character change would help. Tried thinking up some ideas. Nope. I think the muse died with her. I want to come back, for real. But nothing is moving me. Doesn't help that my whole time with Mynia has been a frustratingly slow plod thanks to incessant IRL distractions.

Real life sure does suck. It sucks so hard it decided to remind me that I can't get away from it, even in my dreams. Bad enough that I have nightmares of going back to school every now and then, now this.

I'm sorry, I should stop ranting...

I can't keep telling people I'll post, when I definitely have no will to. Hopefully I'll be back someday. I just don't know when that day is. This has been a wonderful place.

Oh, and of course, just to make things less of a headache in my departure, I'm releasing my artifact back to the pool. It's probably better used by someone active.

For now, I'll just be on Planet Vegeta farmin muh beets.

I don't want to say goodbye. Instead, I'll just say...